Hope, Honoring, Respect

One of the main signature programs we have offered for 17 years is called Unbridled Hope. The name came from a teaching that I heard by the late Jane Goodall, an amazing soul that believes that each day we have a chance to make a difference for good, one little choice point at a time. 

Her wisdom helped me embrace a Soul-level truth, that no matter what choices or ways I’ve shown up in the past or experiences I’ve had/am having, I always have a choice on how I want to show up now in this moment.  I alone have the power to decide if I want to shift from moving and being driven into actions out of fear, shadow anger, shame/blame, or personal wants that might be born out of separation, pain, suffering, or simply not knowing that there could be a different way to making a new choice; a choice that is rooted in love, joy, compassion, and fierce alignment with what I hope and feel guided to be/do. 

Her teachings mixed with other great spiritual and wisdom teachers open my eyes to the reality that our greatest and real super-power is our power of conscious choice. That I alone hold the power to decide how I want to feel, think, and act regardless of what circumstances I am in, what choices I believe I have or don’t have, and what choices others are making. She helped me remember that we can always find a choice that will honor and serve both ourselves and the whole IF we are courageous and willing enough to first see it, and second pick it–over and over again. 

The life’s work of teachers like Jane, opened my eyes to the word hope as an action, not an idea. 

Since 2010 these words have met visitors to my website: 

Hope walks with medicines of: honor, acceptance, understanding, and clear sight - a willingness to witness what is with courage, compassion, and respect. In The Book of Hope she shared with her co-author Douglas Abrams, “...[people] confuse hope with idealism. Idealism expects everything to be fair or easy or good... [this is] a defense mechanism not unlike denial or delusion. Hope…does not deny the evil but is a response to it. . hope [is] not just wishful thinking. It did take the facts and the obstacles into account, but it did not let them overwhelm or stop us.” Later in the book she says, ““Hope…is what enables us to keep going in the face of adversity. It is what we desire to happen, but we must be prepared to work hard to make it so.”

Hope Protectors

A healing and awakening journey asks us to switch from naive idealism, wishful thinking, and/or avoidant denials of what is, what could be, or should have been, and open to grounded truth of what is. A tricky part of this journey includes working with what I call “hope Protectors”. Hope Protectors are a group of survival and protective mechanisms or programs that are designed by our survival system to help us manage the discrepancies between what is happening around us and/or to us, and what our personal heart yearns for, needs, or whispers to us could be possible if…

Hope Protectors take on my forms and shapes from naive, childlike wishes and seekers of Knights and Saviors to harsh jaded critics that try to snuff out any spark of possibilities with us or another so that we don’t experience the inevitable sting of disappointment, potential loss, or pain of disillusionments that might show up if we try, ask, and/or fail to reach our hopes/dreams. These Protectors are designed to keep us from seeing what is, out of fear that we will not survive or be able to weather the storm of acceptance and meeting what is really happening.  Therefore in order to protect ourselves these aspects of us try to hide and restrict us from connecting with what reality is, and then by default what real choices we have available to us that can truly help us and support us in reaching for our goals in helpful ways. 

Discovering and understanding how your unique system has decided to “manage” hope is a core trek within the journey of awakening, and it can be one of the trickiest parts to navigate.

Why? Because these Protectors are really savvy, subtle, and rooted in language that at first feels helpful and meaningful, but in truth is disrespecting and marginalizing what ourselves, others are experiencing as not real or valid. They undermine the first stage of healing - welcoming and witnessing what another or a Part of us is feeling, thinking, and experiencing holistically with respect. 

The best way to explore these types of Hope Protectors is to begin to notice when you make statements like: 

“Well I can’t change it so...”
or
“It isn’t as big of a deal as what others have been through…” 

While these statements aren’t wrong, they are also often statements that are trying to bully, shame, and discount or disregard our own personal experiences and emotions so that we move on and show up for ourselves or our lives. But what if we can do both? What if we can allow a sacred place within us that acknowledges and respects that we are allowed to have a personal opinion, thought, or preference about a circumstance or experience AND also move into committed actions that help us not hurt us. What if there is a way to walk with hope as a response, like Jane teaches and let that hope for a different experience to guide our actions, while also honoring that troubles exist and that we have Parts of us emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually that need tending to or at the very least acknowledgments of too. 

Again, these are some of the trickiest parts of the journey, and the good news is that there is a way through it. 

Jane and countless others have found the path through and it lies within learning how to awaken to the path of a Sacred Witness. The Sacred Witness is an archetypal pattern that is within all of us. It represents an inner knowing within us that is not lost in separation, fearing hope. The Sacred Witness knows that we are worthy and whole just as we are. It reminds us to seek compassion, and see our true strength and power that is within us. It is an aspect of us that can honor all the different and conflicting facets of us without marginalizing, judging, shaming, assigning pity, avoiding, or over-indulging and losing balance to any aspect of us. 

When we welcome the inner-stance of the Sacred Witness within we can meet all of ourselves rooted in love and respect, including:

• How different Parts of us feel,
• What we personally wish or want to be,
• Where different levels of needs were left unseen, unmet, unheard, or unvalued,
• And understand how different Parts of us would like to have these different aspects tended to (even if those preferences are not something that we can do, give, or would be optimal for ourselves or another).

When we are in the act of Sacred Witnessing, we acknowledge the different things, thoughts, emotions, and sensations that are present with a heart-felt opening to understand, not judge. Witnessing, like hope, is often confused with idealism and indulgence; it is not. Just because we witness something doesn’t mean we are supposed to give it or meet that which we witness with actions that indulge fears, wants, and desires. The purpose of witnessing is simply to honor, acknowledge, and open to a sacred dialogue of understanding allowing that which we are witnesses to share where and what these sensations are born from so that we can let go of the power they hold over us from their unseen, unheard, and unfelt needs. Once that has happened, the trapped trauma is released, and that organically opens us to the second stage of witnessing, the birth and awareness of right action. 

Every act of Sacred Witnessing will lead us through the tension, pain, sorrow, and grief to the version of hope that Jane taught, a conscious choice point led by our true Heart and Soul, not our condition or personal/ego self. The choice point that emerges from authentic witnessing and being with, will always bring us into more balance, “what we desire to happen, but we must be prepared to work hard to make it so”. 

How and Where Do You Start?

You might be thinking, okay Michelle, this is great but where do we start? How do I start? There is just too much… I get it. I’ve been in those questions so many times personally and with clients. I offer you the same starting place I share with clients as we begin the trek of unbridling hope within them, too:

I know that I can’t change what happened or is happening for you. I also can’t wave a magic wand and make everything perfect, comfortable, or easy, because that isn’t real either. What I can tell you is that there is a way through the pain that can truly unwind the dis-ease you are experiencing and begin to help you create new pathways that honor your true self. It starts with learning how to sort through what happened, what that was like for the different Parts of you, and also honoring and engaging with what choices are available to you right now that can begin to help you start to build a little more enjoyment and hope that you are not stuck with things the way they are forever, that you do have within you the power to change your stars and break free from what you feel fated to endure and begin to live, love, and lead your life in a way that feels authentic to real you. And I will need your help, I can’t do it for you. I can be a guide and companion for you, but this is your life and you are your own healer, not me. I don’t have the answers that will work for you, because I’m not you. But I can help provide a sacred space for you to uncover and believe in the answers that are already within you and can support you. And even if Parts of you don’t believe this yet, know, you are worthy of healing, joy, happiness, and laughter; everyone is. Why? Because you are. You don’t have to earn the right to be happy, joyful, or to experience all the health and happiness in life that you can. You don’t have to be perfect, to get it all right, or act right to equal these experiences. You are allowed to be mad, upset, angry, disappointed, nervous, scared, excited, happy, and dare I say hopeful. You have a past, we all do. You made choices you aren’t proud of, we all do. You will continue to stumble and show up in ways you wish you wouldn’t have for yourself and others, we all do. And just like me, you have the power to decide what has authority over you, the past, an opinion, a thought, or fear/desire or your true Heart? Each time you breathe in and out you get to decide: who you are today, who you want to be, and how you want to be. Elenor Rosvelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” That includes your own inner thoughts and protective mechanisms. No matter who or how you were in the past or who/ how a person judges you now or judged you in the past, you are not inferior to or less-than because of this. You are an amazing, beautiful Being that gets to decide every moment of every day that you are alive, how you see yourself and how you want to show up.

Here is an excerpt on a few journal prompts from The Sacred Witness Oracle Guidebook for Card #27 - Self-Respect. 

Reflect on:

• In what areas of my life am I struggling to have regard for myself?
• In those areas, what are the different stories my mind/protectors share with me as to why I am not worthy of having regard for myself in that way?

Take a few grounding breaths and let the image of the Sacred Witness connect and begin to dialogue with you.

• What messages and whispers do you feel coming forward?
• What Parts of you is the Sacred Witness asking for you to lean into and explore more?

To unbridle true hope and the actions that go with it, we first need to gain insights into the hidden ways our thoughts and protective fears are causing us to undervalue ourselves and by default the other, including other people, Beings, and resources such as our time, talents, and even the planet. It is only by becoming aware of these very subtle ways we disrespect ourselves and others that we can stop the harm, understand where those choices came from, and choose a different path. A path of true healing and lasting change.

I hope that this blog has sparks a curiosity of hope within that invites the Sacred Witness energy forward from within, to help illuminate how you can begin to release these types of hidden protective mechanisms and perspectives and open to the Soul-Level truth that you are worthy just as you are, that hope is not naive idealism, but a real grounded courageous inner stance that helps us embrace true respect and the aligned action steps that come with healthy respect for ourselves, our lives, and the impact that our choices have to do good. 

If you are looking to go deeper with this self-reflection inquiry, I recommend checking out Episode 44 of Soulful Practices Podcast where I dive into additional practices and insights into how to cultivate healthy Self-Respect. 

You can watch the full-length episode on: YouTube, Spotify, and Apple Podcast

Also check out my upcoming release, The Sacred Witness Oracle Suite, which includes three sacred tools to support you on the journey of awakening and healing: a 56-card Oracle Deck, an in-depth handbook and Oracle Guidebook, and a companion book to the deck that holds the roots to go deeply into awakening the healing power of the Sacred Witness Trauma Informed Enlightenment. 

Right now you can pre-order the suite through late pledges on Kickstarter until the end of October 2025, after which you can purchase them via our website or most major outlets of your choice.