Can the fear of humiliation be a good thing?

This week I did a thing! I just hit launch on my first Kickstarter campaign and am officially self-publishing a beautiful suite of products The Sacred Witness Oracle Suite: my second book, Trauma Informed Enlightenment: Awakening to the Healing Power of the Sacred Witness and its companion 56 card Oracle Deck with an in-depth Guidebook that highlight fifty-six of the core healing themes and invitations from the book with additional guided journal prompts and somatic practices. 

Creating this suite of products and saying yes to the inner guidance to launch a crowdfunding campaign to help bring it fully into form asked me to take a leap that I almost wasn’t willing to do. Not because I didn’t want to put in the time to create it or share it. I actually LOVED the creation process. Yes, even the incredible gut-wrenching parts of working through the developmental and copy edits. The main reason why it almost remained sitting on my laptop, stuck in stagnation, was because old fears began to surface the minute I finally said yes to running with self-publishing instead of continuing to pursue traditional publishing like my first book. The idea of declaring myself and this suite as something that people would want and support without a publishing house behind it brought up wave after wave of self-doubts, imposter syndrome, feelings of not being enough, and tons of inner stories of all the way I was going to humiliate myself and tank my life and business in one little push of the button to launch my campaign. It was pretty intense, and thank goodness I had the very same toolkit of support to pull from that I share in the Oracle Suite. 

One of the key soulful truths I held to like a lifeline in a storm, was that each time I felt a fear, a story of potential humiliation, or worries of possible desolation bubbling up from a well meaning protective Part within me, I knew it was not something that I was doing wrong, it was actually a signal that I was on exactly where I was supposed to be and in my Divine flow. Each time I felt a wave of fear, I had an opportunity to meet it and know that I was moving toward a new level of real empowerment and freedom. 

This is one of the crazy paradoxical truths that can drive our Mental Beings crazy. If we can see our fear-based thoughts or actions that we often have along with other self-sabotage type behaviors as signs that we have an opportunity step into power instead of a sign that we “haven’t” healed enough, we can use those moments of awareness as invitations to meet ourselves with love, compassion, and curiosity to challenge those stories so that we can move from love not fear.

I recently released a new episode of the Soulful Practices Podcast where I share more about this game-changing shift in how we can connect and work with ourselves. In Episode 39, we also share with viewers a card draw from the upcoming Sacred Witness Oracle Deck # 45 - The Guardian of Power.

One of the unique features about the Sacred Witness Oracle Deck is that all the images feature and invite you to engage with the themes of each card through the Soul Medicines of the Animal, Plant, and Stone Beings as the guides for the Sacred Witness. The ambassador that wanted to represent the Guardian of Power, the survival pattern of the Saboteur in the light, was the Coyote, or who I like to call the cosmic Coyote when they are running in the light. 

People often think of the Coyote as a trickster, but they really aren’t. She is asking you to see your impulses to worry or fears of humiliation as tricksters. They are a natural part of our survival system, designed to keep us safe by making choices that help us stay a part of our pack or tribe at all costs. However, when this card comes forward, it is inviting you to shift your perspective of the Saboteur from that of a shadow trickster, trying to trip you up and stop you at every turn, to the Guardianship level of this pattern—that when you have those random thoughts or behaviors to remember they aren’t random. They are actually an indicator that you are on the path of challenging your old survival patterns and conditioned responses. You are closer than you think to breaking free from your old ways of being and stepping into new empowered choices if you are willing to compassionately witness the fears and courageously connect with your inner wisdom. 

You can watch the full episode on either YouTube, Apple Podcast or Spotify for more insights on how to make this shift. 

Let’s begin now to practice this new perspective: 

Reflect on your current experiences, thoughts, and protective stories that are present.:

See if you can perceive them through the Guardian of Power with the support of the cosmic Coyote. What new stories or Parts of you can you witness on how these experiences might be designed by your own divine timeline of empowerment.

Invite the Sacred Witness energy to help you consciously meet those fears, attachments, and self-doubts and what choices are also available to you if you can courageously connect with who you truly be and what you are being to create at this time. 

If you can address those parts of you or old stories, what would that change?

Soulful Practice

I set the intention to meet my fears of humiliation with love, compassion, and courage. 

I ask for reiki energy to help guide my attention to the ways in which: 

• I feel that my personal power is limited at this time? 
• I’m stuck in a conditioned fear based story that is attached to the perspective of old fears
• I’m nervous if I make an empowered choice to create in alignment with my heart, I might have parts of me that think I’m going to be judged, make someone uncomfortable, or have to show up as a version of me that might not match people’s expectations. 

From those moments of awareness I ask for support to help me engage in the flow of awareness to what fears or old stories are a part of those fears so that I can meet them with love to help them release and connect with the aligned action steps and power choices the Guardian of Power is asking me to take in my daily life.

I’m really excited to hear how you are doing with this practice, because self-sabotage and stumbling into the unconscious pattern of fears of humiliation is normal and actually a huge sign that you are so close to stepping into your next level of personal power. So keep going, open to a little coyote medicine in the light and take a risk, you got this!

And I would love to officially invite you to help support my Kickstarter campaign. It goes live on Tuesday, August 26th at 9 am ET and you can be among the first to bring home this gorgeous, soulful Suite to help support you in your daily practices. The process of creating this Suite has literally changed my life and me, liberating me in ways I had no idea where even needed, and I know it will do the same for all those that partner with it.

Offering light, love, and JOY - Michelle