Rooting ourselves in Love instead of Fear

Transformational change can be messy and confusing, and there are moments when we feel like we are being dragged back into the clutches of old paradigms and past ways of being. To stay committed to the changes we seek, we need to find a lifeline in the chaos that allows us to hold tight to our vision and continue on the path of evolutionary change.  

So often when we find ourselves in those rougher moments of transformation change it feels like everything we normally can hold to is dissolving around us.  In those moments, it is natural for us to try to motivate ourselves into recommitting to the changes we think can help us through beating the drum of fears or promise-land thinking.  Either doorway is problematic because they are both ultimately rooted in energies of shadow domination, dualist thinking, and escapism instead of bringing forward changes that are in true alignment with the energies that match the transformational changes we are seeking.  

If we want to create true transformation change, either within ourselves or collectively, it begins with changing how we are willing to motivate ourselves.  

Kristin Neff, a teacher in the field of compassion work, said:

What does it look like to move into action with love motivating me and not fear?

It requires me to be attached to my “why” and not to an outcome specifically.

“Why” can be a tricky word.  

Most of the time we use the word “why” attached to a shadow victimization point of view - Why is this happening to me?  This question can help us discover what is happening right now and how we can best support ourselves. However, this question is typically associated with thoughts and beliefs that take us deep into the weeds.  We can easily become burdened and trapped in a never-ending feedback loop of seeking to find the source of our problem and to assign blame and shadow judgements as to why it happened that really do nothing but appease the question of why.

The type of “why” I'm referring to is to know what is guiding our actions and our thoughts.  Understanding and clarifying “my why” gives me the ability to gain deep insights into what is truly driving my choices? What is my real motivation?  And doing so allows me to ensure that my actions are in true alignment with my inner guidance.  

Understanding your why allows you to root yourselves in your true purpose.  

Think of a tree with its roots, if there are only shallow roots that are trying to hold up a tree it is easily pushed over.  However, if it has deep healthy roots that link together with the earth and other healthy root systems, together the tree can stand strong and hold itself even in a heavy storm.  That is the power of love over fear.  It gives us deep roots that are interconnected with others and helps us stand strong in our “why” even in the face of pressures from fear.    

I recently released a new episode on the Soulful Practices Podcast that explores this topic more in-depth. I share a story from my first book, The Horse Cure, of a beautiful client's journey of discovering her true why that was rooted in love and how those roots served as a lifeline for her during a very difficult part of her transformational journey. Tune in to this episode on YouTube or Spotify.

Reflective Practice for You - What are my roots?

Take a moment and bring forward an image of yourself as a tree and allow yourself to focus on the roots.  

What type of roots do you have?  These are your Core beliefs and conscious whys.

List a few of your whys.

Which ones can help serve as a lifeline of support for you during waves of fear and uncertainty?

Is there an additional root or why that you would like to add to your root system to help guide your actions and thoughts at this time?

Examples of some of my roots come from the 5 principles of Reiki:

Each day I seek:

• To move from love, not from fear.
• Understanding and compassion when I feel anger.
• To be honest with my self-reflections and to see through the eyes of the Soul.
• To bring the medicines of gratitude and blessing to myself and others.
• To offer kindness and compassion to all Beings.   

Looking for ways to deepen this practice on how to strengthen your roots in love check out our Connecting with Joy! membership community.  We are currently on season 5 and are attuning our life to access greater joy, harmony, and love through the Reiki Principles.  

Offering you light, love, and JOY!

Michelle